JOY

Some the greater "joys" in my life. Top left: my roommates Jordan and Erin. Top right: friends at school that are always up for a lunch time break. Center: mi familia. Bottom left: my truest friend, Josephine. Bottom right: Blake, Jules, and Eric having fun.

          

  I spent the day tormented by John Wilmont’s “Satyr Against Reason and Mankind”. Between the animalistic metaphors, difficult vocabulary (words like affable, prelatic, obstreperous, and tawdry kept me from reading quickly), and 18^th century history that hid between the margins, I was completely lost. Class starts in a half hour and I have an infinitesimal idea of what Wilmont was trying to convey.

            Simplistically Wilmont contends that humanity is flawed and there is no way to fix it. He demonstrates humanity’s covet for reason and our pitfalls that arise out of reason’s tension with reality. What I gathered from the famed satyr was a sense of hopelessness. If as Wilmont says “Man differs more from man than man from beast” what am I doing with my life? Why do I care about anyone else outside of myself?

            Cross-curricular dialogue with my philosophy class only confused me more. We talked today in class about “the meaning of life” (how ambiguous is that?). We discussed if it was even worth our time to care about finding the meaning of life and if it is subjective rather than objective. My point being, in every class, I felt uncertain and therefore, helpless as well when it came to a sense of purpose.

            So where is the turning point, the “ahh-ha moment”? I can’t say that my epiphany solved the age-old philosophical questions about human purpose, or humanity’s flaws. But, I do know that yesterday falling asleep was nearly impossible. I sat in bed thinking about the lunch I had with friends that genuinely care about me and reciprocally, I care about them as well. A rush of thankfulness for people that were genuine in my life took hold of me. I thought of my roommates who are two of the most kind and hard-working people I know. My mom who may love her parrot more than me right now but is always and will always be there for me, my dad that waited with me at the airport for almost two hours on Sunday night, step-parents that aren’t classically evil, and siblings that are my best friends. I laughed at pictures from Spring Break and reflected on the people that went out of their way to spend time with me, just because they care. I anxiously am awaiting the arrival of my best friend, Josephine, who is visiting in a week and Jules and I was just overwhelmed. I was overwhelmed by the happiness that surrounded me and by the people that love me.

            My point is, with all the good in my life, I can’t think of many things that are more important than spreading the happiness that I have. So whether it is "arguably reasonable" according to Wilmont, or it serves as a meaning to my own life, service is the best way for me now to spread the indescribable joy that kept me awake last night. 50 days and counting let the joyous celebration begin!